Take a breath & Scroll to the right S e a r c h

Friday, June 3 11:31 PM jiao eh hang sua Monday, May 30 12:17 AM 40 hands Labels: ART Friday, May 27 2:25 AM Labels: ART Friday, May 20 7:33 PM So today i spend my day Sleeping Having dreams of paranoia Lying on bed bathing in sweat Doing nothing Becoming Nothing Thursday, May 19 1:53 AM Ippudo has seriously legit pork slices though 2 bucks a bite slice is a fucking rip Wednesday, May 18 2:13 AM I Am Lost only for A Little While Tuesday, May 17 10:25 PM It hurts when I repeatedly tell you that I miss you and i need you and all I get is Nope. 11:10 AM i have to stop scratching my hands Monday, May 16 11:12 PM 10:23 PM okay fuck this is not cool im not supposed to be sobbing 10:10 PM This is the part where i say I am a bad person part 2 i dont know what ive done and how ive done it but i just feel so rotten inside all the time theres no mood for anything productive while there are so many other things to think of that matters but my mind just cant get off you for a minute i mean did i kill the night off - quite possibly, looking back at myself i dont know sometimes i hate myself for being myself i dislike myself to the point that i dont even know when to let go or give in so basically in a nutshell i am dissappointed in myself and i shall continue the self loathe tonight geez way to be cool more like i fucked the whole thing up fucking useless thing i am damn okay time to cry goodbye people :"( 5:22 PM ---------------------------------------------------------------- Thank you for the Green tea Frappe it was very nice and made nicer because of the kind gesture thank you ---------------------------------------------------------------- \ 2:41 AM I am a bad person. I plead to God for forgiveness, before falling all over into the same pitfalls that bring me down over and over again I repeatedly ask myself if it could had been better if I had not did this did that did whatever but sometimes the paranoia and nervousness just engulfs me to this pitiful, weak state with a mentality of a 5 year old boy everytime i tell myself yeah this is serious i wont do it again is when it hits the hardest and everytime it causes me to sin over and over again it feels worse right after it ends there is no excitement in it at all yet my flesh cannot help but crave for this temporal gain it is all but an escape from my supposed escape can't you see it? when an escape exit is closed i turn to the other exit where in turn althought i get out of the room, the exit leads me to the first exit where the first exit is now a flaming sword that cuts my heart into pieces and it cuts just where it hurts the most i am so confused and lost yet amidst this chaos there is even more chaos and there is too much on my plate for me to even nibble out of it someone is pushing my face onto the whole plate and mushing my face onto the bottom i am at the point where another step takes me into a flying fuck down a thousand feet into nothingness in my desperation god surely you must save me do not leave me now my father for i am dirty and desperate for a shower i know i do not deserve but in your great mercy please pour out someone to save me from all the mess that surrounds me this is a whirlpool of self discouragement where i hate myself uncontrollably for being incontrollable why is it that one can become a puppet to whom who controls it seemingly dependent on my actions or am i thinking too much into things but i think auto karma exists somewhere ? or does it not or am i paranoid but my repeat observations prove me right as i fall again and again and again and again and again why do i seem incorrigible F U C K i cannot bear myself anymore i need to escape from all this shit to a land far far away there is too much pain for my soul to bear where is this cup which i can remove where is the wickedness i can remove for i bring upon myself nothing but trouble time and time again after i know it will happen this is insanity in its finest display i think i should be in a mental hospital or something yet i am dying day by day rotting myself away and sadly only few observe and notice yet for those who have i greatly thank you for you have been with me this while and there is nothing i can do but thank you all over and over and over again while i fade into nothingness oh my spirit is down jesus i need you do not give up on me 2:15 AM Please someone help me I'm dying here in front of you Thursday, May 12 12:03 AM Turn your head, across the sea, wave your sorrow, wait for me, and with my eyes, I see your face , drifting slowly in this place, and now it seems, theres no time to fill, all these hours, standing still, and where I am, it might not be there, a place I know, I will disappear Wednesday, May 11 9:32 AM Hi God i need some form of balance in this lunacy sin is the anchor holding me down but since then i have restrained from sin why is there still so many anchors Tuesday, May 10 11:24 PM Daud and Yk came over for beers and talks good times good times finally meeting up ! gotta go out with the group soon kinda miss them Monday, May 9 5:05 AM I had a bad dream That i dont think its a dream because i dont dream and wake up and feel my insides shooting out of me and i have to fight whatever it is to get up twice and feel fucked up after it all O well its always the same message as the previous ones, but how do i rid myself of something i cannot find ; this thing baffles me but yet i am merely all but a tool in a hand o well better be a working one then on the contrary the day is awesome whereby i get to bake duck pizzas and hang out with fish and get introduced to semi pro and big bang theory and actually like it mmhmm and....time to do some sketching now tatas people Friday, May 6 11:20 PM This week ISP ended! It's nice now that im ( rather ) free and yeah there are alot of other stuff to be done - which kind of contradicts the line above D: So anyway did a couple of things this week like watching thor and going to zouk and what not, we've to actually play abit this week cause we'd be probably doing work ( again ) cause Fish and I decided to heed our lecturer's prodding and try to submit our isp for the crowbar stuff. the only confusing thing is the dates stated, some said it was friday ( today ) while the paper said like 16th may and 16th may the drums are coming so its kinda of like we submit and go celebrate - meanwhile we're still confused over the internship and crap, i think i might take up the extra module and see what cool course to take, if got video production then o yeahh and then i've this two freelance projects to do, so.. prolly gonna send files over on monday or something roasted duck pizza tomorrow cant wait for it so hyped PIZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZA break week this week peace out niggas! Monday, May 2 1:52 AM wheeee Older Posts Newer Posts

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